you'll have to get used to that Jade..

376 miles, 7 hours, 2 boxes of dinky sausage rolls and 1 loo break - the move from Essex to Scotland is complete.

Arriving in Kirkcudbright on the same day the Kelpies welcoming ceremony takes place (note to self: must google what a Kelpie is), I  wandered down to the harbour to check it out. Picnics everywhere, a band playing the Proclaimer's '500 miles' and a man wearing an orange kilt. Seriously.

This morning, in a bid to organising my five suitcases I popped a wash on and thought I would enjoy the novelty of hanging the washing out. After living in a flat for nine years and being able to sling my washing on to the radiators dressed in just my pants and eating biscuits - running a bumble bee gauntlet and swallowing a cobweb took me quite by surprise.

Along with my sister and her pal (holidaying here from Essex) we thought we would whizz to nearby Castle Douglas for some shopping. (Dressed in a Jumpsuit, Uggs and Sunny's - "Jade could you be anymore Esex?!") Sorry Vivienne Westwood, sorry River Island, sorry Primark - I have no choice but to spend my money in the only shop available. Wilkinsons. I feel unfaithful. I feel stunned. I feel like I'm going to discover what it means to have savings.
No new shoes but hey I am excessively excited by my new cake pop stands. Go Wilkos, I never knew you had it in you!

Onwards we march to Tesco. Scottish Tesco can't be different to Essex Tesco, right? WRONG. There were no boodles (you know, the vegetable spaghetti adored by hipsters all over), there was no Philadelphia Lightest, there was no 'Light' anything! Green food is restricted to one teeny tiny aisle and all the sausages are square.
I don't think we are in Kansas anymore, Toto.

With a bag laden with full fat beige-non green products we drive home - and straight through a winding country road full to the brim with the aroma of cow bum. Pinching my nostrils with one hand, changing gear with the other, steering with my knees and screaming my sweet head off, the sister pipes up "you'll have to get used to that Jade..."